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ShorDurPerSav

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Fightin' Jesus

The Fightin' Jesus, the 3rd most common ShorDurPerSav after "Bob" and Connie

In the Church of the SubGenius, SubGenii often worship Short Duration Personal Saviors (ShorDurPerSavs). ShorDurPerSavs offer all of the features and services of regular personal saviors, but are disposable. Thanks to their planned obsolescence, no SubGenius worships the same ShorDurPerSav for very long before switching to another one. The most common ShorDurPerSav is J. R. "Bob" Dobbs, followed by Connie Dobbs and then The Fightin' Jesus. Other common ShorDurPerSavs include Jehovah 1, Francis E. Dec, Eris Discordia, Adolf Hitler, Emperor Norton, The Bleeding Head of Arnold Palmer, Robert Anton Wilson, L. Ron Hubbard, Alien Sex Goddesses, Satan, the number 23, Barack Obama, and Cthulhu.

Anybody or anything can be a ShorDurPerSav; it doesn't even have to be a person or a deity, it doesn't even have to exist. For some SubGenii, a new NYES video game they just started playing is their ShorDurPerSav. For others, some idiotic kook in a YouTube video spouting conspiracy theories is their ShorDurPerSav. For others, it could be a dog or a cat or any other animal, or a plant, or a pet rock, or a particularly tasty type of food. For some narcissistic SubGenii, they are THEIR OWN ShorDurPerSavs. And sometimes SubGenii worship other people as ShorDurPerSavs JUST TO PISS THEM OFF. For SubGenii who are into drugs (typically frop), the latest drug they tried might be their ShorDurPerSav. For SubGenii who like porn, their ShorDurPerSav might be whichever porn star they are currently masturbating to. For SubGenii who have money problems and finally get ahold of some cash, their ShorDurPerSav might be the money in their wallet. For Rewardian couch potatoes, it might be their favorite TV show, while for Emergentiles who just got some work done, it could be the satisfaction of a job well done. For SubGenii who enjoy excremeditation, their ShorDurPerSav might be THEIR OWN SHIT. It can be anything at all!

While most SubGenii typically start out with "Bob" as their ShorDurPerSav (and Bobbies never leave this phase), most SubGenii DO leave that phase and move onto worshiping other things, only for short durations. It basically just depends on what is most worthy of being worshiped for a short duration as a personal savior at any given moment. ShorDurPerSavs are also reusable and recyclable, so the same ShorDurPerSav can be used and reused multiple times, although if they are worshiped too many times they start to get stale and develop quite a rotten pstench that can be whiff-read through the third nostril. Typically, the first ShorDurPerSav that this happens to is "Bob" Dobbs, which is why SubGenii must eventually stop worshiping "Bob" and move onto other things. Anyone who keeps worshiping "Bob" (or anything else) for a long time obviously can't whiff-read the awful rotten pstench through their third nostril that is caused by too much worship of the same personal savior for too long. And each SubGenius needs to decide their own Short Duration Personal Saviors on their own, instead of just copying someone else and worshiping whatever someone else worships. This is an essential part of SubGenius dogma.

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